The first thing I noticed in this picture was Mary's face; that soul searing stare of abject apathy, like American Gothic after a Nietzsche and horse tranquilizer binge. Those dead, slightly squinted eyes and pursed lips-judging, always judging-set into a head that more resembles a flesh tone aspirin capsule then anything even vaguely human. It's the kind of thing I expect to see staring back at me a thousand fold from a lsd spiked bowl of rice crispies.

Mary's deformity doesn't end there though. If we look down at her left hand, we can see that, beyond whatever crippling genetic condition has given her a watermelon shaped head, she is afflicted with what I can only assume to be leprosy. Her hand has, perhaps in a desperate attempt to appear shaded, turned a disturbing greenish brown. No doubt it will soon drop off, sending the poor messiah child tumbling head over heels into the hard tile below and ending prematurely what surely would have been a life of endless prosperity, good fortune and not being nailed to things.

Of course, neither of these two minor deformations come close to the crowning glory of Our lady of extra chromosomes' greatest feature: The shoulder boob. Now, I must admit I was perplexed by this at first; my first thought was "why is Jesus blond, curly haired and drunk off his ass?", but in a close second was "Why is he drinking from a flesh colored funnel?" Of course the reality of the situation dawned on me moments later and immediately set my mind reeling with all sorts of questions about the rest of her anatomy; hypothetical armpit vaginae and knee livers flooded my mind, followed swiftly by a longing for death.